It didn't start out so well. In fact, it started out with vomit on Patrick's blues ... but Wesley and Patrick went upstairs, changed clothes, and we drove to school.
In front of school, where his class was lining up, Wesley held on to me and refused to get in line with the other children. He finally did, and though I couldn't see him, I could hear him crying as he walked in.
I trusted him. I turned with Patrick and Boden and walked away.
Two hours later, I got a call, "Wesley vomited. He doesn't have a fever so I think it's nerves, but he does need a clean pair of shoes."
I drove to school, attached the visitor ID to my shirt and walked to the clinic. I found him sitting quietly with his hands in his lap.
"How are you?"
"I threw up."
"Do you think you're nervous about school?"
"Yeah. I think I had butterflies in my stomach. But they're all out now."
"You feel like finishing the day?"
"Yeah."
I was so proud of him.
The next few days were rough. I had started school the week before and Wesley does not deal well with change. Spontaneity, sure, but long-term change not so much.
Yesterday was the first day I picked up a child who was enthusiastic about school and seeing me again. This morning was the first morning I saw him run to line to sit next to a friend.
I'm excited for him. I know transitions are tough, but I've seen him pull through again and again and each time he grows a little more assured of himself and his place in the world. I can't wait to see what he chooses to do with his education and the relationships (with peers, teachers, knowledge, his own talents) he forms along the way.
No matter what he does, if he comes away with solid standing in knowing his own unique gifts to share with the world and a desire to make the world a better place then I know he'll do well. He's already showing that he knows how to keep going and trust that everything will be OK even when he is afraid and doesn't know what lies around the corner, or in this case, down the hall of his elementary school.
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Friday, August 28, 2009
First day of school
Thursday, August 13, 2009
Happy Birthday, Wesley!!
I can't believe you are only four today ... seems like I've been tickled by your outbursts of laughter forever :D
He sometimes asks, "Will you be my mom for ever and ever and ever?"
"I'm the lucky one who gets to be your mom for ever and ever," I said as we throw our arms around each other with a hug. Sometimes, it's actually with a tear because we were both upset at each other and he had just said something like, "I don't want you, I want a different mommy!"
Wesley is bright and creative. When the fire alarm was beeping because it needed a new battery he said, "There's bat in there, mom, it's squeaking and saying, 'change my battery.'" Then he asked me if I would change it and I told him that I didn't want to and that his father would later that evening. Then Wesley said, "If you go get a screwdriver I'll teach you, but you have to help because it's too high for me."
My day is filled with sweet moments like that. As well as with cunning moments. He finds many different ways to ask for chocolate milk to try and trick me if he knows he can't have any because it's either too late or he already had a glass. "Can I have brown milk?" "Can I have the milk I had yesterday?" "Can I have my favorite milk?" "Can I have something that I like?"
He is very patient with Boden and kindly makes him things out of Legos. Finally, Wesley is realizing that it's OK if Boden breaks his gifts and rearranges them a bit. He refers to his brother as Bo-bear and runs to him in bed if he is still sleeping. Sometimes he lies next to him and sometimes he tries to wake him up so they can play.
Wesley is a force. He knows what he wants and doesn't back down when he isn't feeling cooperative. Usually, I can get him to show his cooperation. He's very excited about starting Pre-K on the 24th of August. We go to his open house in a week. He'll do well. He considers every child an automatic friend and when we see someone knew he asks me, "What's that friend's name? Can I go find out? Let's go play with that friend."
When children shut him out for whatever reason they do, he just ignores it and goes on. He will play with someone until they accept him. If someone says, "You're not my friend," he goes on to the other kid in the group and befriends that one, then the others accept him. Usually. Not everyone is as friendly, but he handles rejection very well. I don't try to shelter him from it. I don't try to assume from the start who will accept him and who will reject him ... I have been surprised too many times! When he is rejected I let him know that maybe next time that child will be in the mood to play and that we all want space or special time with certain people sometimes.
I am so delighted by the emerging boy inside of him. He's tough and sensitive at the same time. He puts up a good argument, at the same time I can use his smarts to reason with him. I just adore him.
The other night I was reflecting on how little time there is for myself. Heck, I'm up at 4 a.m. to write this and drink some coffee alone today. I wondered what life would be like without small children ... sure, I'd have time to watch a movie, repair my chairs, paint my hutch a funky color, and pick out curtains ... but then who would be there to turn those chairs into rocket ships, open the hutch doors for art supplies or giggle with his brother behind curtains just to "surprise" me?
Life would not be the same without Wesley. I thank God that I get to be his mommy "forever and ever."
Here's a picture of Wesley helping us paint his room:
And here he is in the tree house daddy is building for him:
And here he is enjoying his baby brother:
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Wednesday, April 22, 2009
Boden Took 7 Steps, etc.
Boden took seven steps today!
Before Patrick left for D.C., he said, "Boden might be walking by the time I get back," because the baby had just taken five steps.
Looks like he was right!
***
On another note, a friend called me to ask if I could watch her son for her while she rant to a doctor's appt. Her original sitter canceled. I said I would do it and I'm so glad :) I like having a network of moms that share and help out. I feel so connected. *Warm Fuzzies*
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Wesley rides his bike without training wheels. That's kind of old news, as in two weeks ago, but I forgot to update. Maybe I did, not sure. Anyway, yup, Patrick and a neighborhood dad taught him how while I was at class one night.
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Patrick is in D.C. again. He says the meetings are boring. I think it'd be cool to be in the Pentagon though ya know? How boring can it be? Oh, never mind, I just remembered who he works for.
***
I just turned in a paper that I really like. It's a proposal for electronic support groups for isolated moms. Nothing new, really, but I certainly enjoyed diving into the literature/research about motherhood, depression, environmental support, stress, connection, familial ties, etc. That was a blast. And can I just say I LOVE that I can do my research from home? Thank you, online libraries and online access to professional journals everywhere! I love being a student again :D
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Don't tell Patrick, but I just reorganized our office space. I have to get it ready for my research class this summer. I hear it's a tough one. So if I can get an idea about what I'll have to do/read before hand then I can get an advantage on the summer work. Of course, I still have four projects and two tests coming due this semester. Perhaps, I won't be getting a head start after all.
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The dogs are great. I am teaching them NOT to bark when our neighbors ring the door bell, which is every day. Especially because little children come by to see if Wesley can play (I love that!) and I don't our dogs scaring them.
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That's all for this random update!
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Tuesday, April 14, 2009
What are these toes up to?
Monday, April 13, 2009
Virtue of the Week(s)
Our virute of focus for the next two weeks is:
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