Virtue of the Week(s)

Our virute of focus for the next two weeks is: 

Responsibility!

This virtue will be our main topic at our "Don't Waffle" Saturday morning family devotions this week and my "Hearth and Soul" ladies devotions next Sunday night. 

It is the primary focus of our point chart, through which Wesley earns points and saves them for rewards. It is also our primary focus in our lives right now as we look for ways to act now rather than later and own our actions as well. 

I have a list of things to act on right now that I am putting off for various reasons. Sometimes I shy away from conflict, so with this virtue in sight I am praying to develop the assertiveness, focus, and fortitude to take the actions that I've been putting off. 

I'm looking for a childen's activity for this Saturday's devotions ... something focused on responsibility. So if you have any suggestions ... please share in the comments. And if you have any thoughts and/or tips related to this virtue. Please share those as well! 

Read more!

still looking for a home

This afternoon (Monday, August 4) will mark our one week tenure at the Fairfield Inn. We're staying in a King suite with a pull out queen. Wesley seems to like his bed. Every morning when we fold the bed back into the couch he says, "Hey, where'd the bed go?" and then looks at us for a laugh. And in the evening when we pull out the bed he says, "Hey, where's the couch?"

Patrick and I share the king bed with Boden. Boden, of course, sleeps cuddled up in a pile of cuteness right next to me.

I am enjoying being a mother of two children as I live the life of a "housewife" dream -- no dinners to cook, no toilets to clean, hardly any laundry to wash. Basically, I entertain Wesley and stare at Boden all day. Sure, I change quite a few diapers and mange a few tantrums in the process, but even that is enjoyable.

In the process of looking for a home we've learned a lot about our values. For instance, we're not very willing to consider homes without trees. What good is a backyard if our children can't enjoy it until November and if our dogs won't even consider going out to pee until 10 p.m.? Can you imagine Wesley not playing outside just because it's 100 degrees? No, he'd want to be right out there sweat and all, which means Bo and I would have to deal or Wesley would have to quell his natural fascination with all things outdoors.

Neighborhood vibe is important too.

There's a lot wrapped up in a community. For one, every time we move somewhere, we have a chance to extend our "family" network of friends and loved ones. A community structure offers a certain life rhythm: where are we going to play, when are we going to play, when will we walk the dogs? Are there other children outside? Do the women and men get together? These are all questions that we are considering as we choose our next home.

UPDATE:

Choice made. We found a nice house with a great backyard in a friendly community. I walk the dogs after 9 p.m. every night and notice people out talking, walking, etc. I'll share more as I learn more about this area, for now, it seems like a good choice. The house itself is far from ideal for what we need. For instance, we don't need a formal dining room, but we could use a fourth bedroom and I certainly wold prefer a home without carpet in the bathroom -- yuck! *Sigh* The backyard, however, is worth putting up with the minor inconveniences posed by carpeted bathrooms. Read more!

Just a Swingin' and Dreamin'

I rarely post pictures without a dash of home-brewed wisdom, so let's see if I can come up with anything that relates to the following mega-dose of cuteness. I don't blame you if you can't tear your eyes away from the pictures long enough to read ... I keep scrolling down to see them again and again as I type.

I'm not sure why I keep looking ... I do know that to me, these images (by Aunt Casey) capture something special about childhood ... I'm still trying to put my finger on it.


Do you ever think if life gets any happier you might burst inside? I think that, or feel it, almost every night.

Almost every night Patrick and I go into Wesley's room and play with him for about 30 minutes, it's our way of winding down with him and ending the day -- no matter how hard it was -- with laughter, family togetherness, songs, prayers and whatever else flows from our hearts.



Throughout the evening last night Wesley spontaneously hugged my neck and placed his cheek next to mine. It had been a rough day. He had just spent a weekend away from us and came back ready to test his home and his boundaries to see if anything had changed. Nothing had: I was still firm and held age-appropriate expectations. He just needed to double check, and triple check, and throw tantrums, and throw things (at me), etc. until he knew for sure that he could still count on me, and that his world was still safe and supportive no matter what.

Later that night, toward the end of our time together, Wesley pretended he was a flying dinosaur and flapped his arms as high and fast as he could.

"I want to fly! I want to fly!" he said.

Patrick lifted him into the air and I laughed with joy at their delight. We gave Wesley affirmations, to the extent that we could, about his dream: he probably won't ever be able to flap his arms and fly, but there are other ways he can make his dreams come true.



Heck, for all we know, perhaps his dreams have already have come true, after all, as you see in the picture below, Wesley has two colorful wings and his feet are off the ground.

Who knows where he was going in his mind when this picture was taken, or where he'll take his life long after this memory fades... all I know is that I want a fraction of his belief ...




... that any dream is possible and that there is no reason in the world his dreams won't come true.

One day I want to be the one relishing in my safety and lack of fear as I jump on the bed, flap my arms, and exclaim, "I want to fly, I want to fly" ... and then one day ... look down to find my feet above the earth and my colorful wings outspread.

Even though he's the one testing me to make sure his boundaries are still safe and held in his best interest, I'm the one with a lot to learn -- from him -- about boundaries and possibilities.

I'm tired of confusing safety and fear. And I am ready to claim and name my dreams! Thank YOU, Wesley (and of course Patrick)! Read more!

Quick Reminder

I just read in another blog about a father who is happy he has learned how to wear a sling (congrats!), and it reminded me of our early days. This borrowed sling is actually on wrong, but you can't really tell ;) We eventually became "experts" and hiked all over the place slinging (and breastfeeding, well, I did, not Patrick).

It's fun to carry around a little pea in a pod!

I can't wait to do it again! So here's a little reminder of what is to come ...


Oh, and then another reminder: that pea quickly grows up, so do all you can do to cherish those first few days/weeks/months!!!! Then do all you can do to cherish the rest ;)

The surprising thing about parenthood, and this from a mom who LOVES the newborn stage, is that every stage becomes my new favorite!

Read more!

It's Almost Time to Say ....

Good-bye.

While watching a scene from a movie with a fast train in it, Wesley turned to me and asked, "Do you remember Rowan?"

"Yes, of course I remember Rowan,"I replied. "We saw him at the picnic." I thought he was talking about a little boy in our Baha'i community.

He looked at me with another question written on his face: "Do you remember Rowan on the train -- the fast train?"

"Yes!" I exclaimed; No way! I thought.

I was astonished that he was referring to the Rowan he met six months previously in Switzerland. We talked about the fun we had on Switzerland's transportation system of buses and trains, and the fun he had with my friend Emily's children. He only spent a short time with Rowan and his sister, and he remembers them -- fondly. More than that, I sensed he feels a bond with Rowan. And isn't quite aware of the distance between them.

I wish they had more time together.

***

My dad came into town Friday. He brought Wesley a German-made electric train set. I don't know, but perhaps it is similar to the one that his grandfather bought for him when he lived in Germany. I do know that Wesley and his grandfather share a joy in playing with trains.

My dad left on Saturday. Minutes later he called:

"I feel like I didn't stay long enough."

"Me too." Silence -- we were both crying. "I think we feel this way because we didn't get much time together ..."

More silence. More tears.

I don't remember the rest of the conversation, in the end he told me he would be back in a few weeks to meet the new baby, we hung up, and I continued to cry. I wasn't crying because I missed him in that moment, I did, but the depth of my feeling and the situation didn't match -- I was crying because I had missed him for so long.

I wish we had hadmore time together.

***

I don't know how many times I've dropped off Patrick at an airport knowing it would be months before I would see him again.

A couple of those times I parked my car, walked with him to the terminal (back when we could do that sort of thing) ,and held his hand until he had to walk through the terminal doors. But I prefer the drop-kiss method. The one where you stop briefly outside the airport, give your loved one a quick kiss, watch him walk away with his bags, and then speed off, turn up the radio, and numb out before the tears have a chance to flow.

I always wished we had more time together.

***

I find that good-byes vary from awkward to torture.

I'm not sure how much of my current withdrawal from my community and friends has to do with this self-protection factor and how much of it is a genuine effect of life as it is with a busy husband, a book that keeps needing new scenes/edits, a difficult pregnancy, nurturing a busy toddler, and a desire to take advantage of my post-grad work through the Southeast Institute by reading, writing, and signing up for every weekend workshop that I can while I am here.

I read in an article (reference to come) that many pregnant women focus more on "being" than "doing" ... we recycle the being needs of the infants inside of us. We do this partly through our connection to them and partly to "fill up" and ready ourselves for the journey of nurturing and sacrifice that newborns require. Receiving nurturing and nurturing ourselves simply for who we are and not what we do becomes very important.

So whether because of this time of rapid internal and family growth, or because of unnecessarily making myself busy as a defense, I'm sorry that I will soon be leaving without knowing many of the people I know better.

Whether I know you through my training, through my neighborhood, my Baha'i circle, the Pin, Patrick's work, or any of the random and instantly fun and/or inspirational encounters I've had here, I'm sorry we didn't make more time together for general gab or whatever it is that brings people closer and more aware physically, of the bond that unites us spiritually.

Also, I am grateful for knowing you. You are each unique in who you are and what you choose to do with your time and life. You are each an inspiration to me. We may or may not have a lot of things in common, but that doesn't matter. It's how you are you and how you have something unique and new to offer others that I cherish you -- for it's our differences, not our similarities, that enrich us. And those differences, often the counterparts to my weaknesses, are the pieces I want to take with me as I move to San Anotnio, and to any other place around the world thereafter.

***

Wesley wasn't sad when he was remembering Rowan. He was rather joyful.

Once again I find myself standing in the shadows of my son's reality. At two, he doesn't know distance and time as barriers as I know them. And he doesn't feel sadness at his separation from people he loves and enjoys. Rather, he remembers them fondly.

I may not have spent as much time with all of you that I would have liked to ... but I am taking a piece of you with me.

And I am reminding myself that no matter how much or little time I have to spend and know the people who cross my path, no matter where I go, because of the natural spiritual connection we share, you are with me. And I am with you.

(That knowledge won't replace a phone call, a letter, an email, or a quick blog comment though, so let's stay in touch!)

Read more!

Value of Imagination, Family Play

Imagination Adventure:

A bed becomes a boat,
Blue silk below a sea,
Sticks catch fish,
We set them free.

Last night our small family sailed for 45 minutes in Wesley's bed. Together we turned our sail to capture the wind over the sea as our magic fishing poles pulled up whales, sharks, snakes, dragonflies and butterflies.

For those few minutes, we lived in a fantasy world, where Wesley was Captain and we his little mates.

The fantasy didn't stop when we tucked him in to bed. He saw stars and spaceships above his head and he heard the songs of frogs and birds though the night was silent.

Engaging a child's (along with your inner child's) imagination, and letting them fill the room with their fantasies shows them -- in a way that words can not tell -- that our time with them is valuable and their imagination and play time is valuable.

And still it's more: During the bedtime play Wesley re-enacted the time he fell into the bog at the Chapel Hill Botanical Gardens. I believe that during the re-enactments of having both mommy and daddy alternatively pull him out of the water and take care of him he was resolving some emotional residue related to the event. After about 5 re-enactments -- he started to swim in the water.

Play is a powerful invaluable tool for children -- and for the watchful parent, for we can learn through their play how they are doing. And often, how we are doing as well. Read more!

My Training, Our Move, and Holes

I spent a 3-day weekend training in Advanced Integrative Technique, formerly called Seemorg Matrix work. What? You don't know what that is by the name? It is one school in the growing field of energy psychology.

This particular seminar was titled Presence and taught us how to use AIT to remove trauma related to dissociation, which interferes with whole presence to the here and now. I enjoyed the training and hope to find a way to work with it in San Antonio after our move. Heck, I hope to find a way to continue all my training in San Antonio -- I love it. Everything I study is enjoyable and I find it rather fulfilling, a definite part of the complete me that as a mom I could easily neglect.

"After our move."

It's just a three-word phrase and yet a lot will shift between now and then.

First of all, we've got to figure out the logistics of moving two cars, two dogs, two boys (one nearly three years old and another three weeks old), and ourselves from North Carolina to Texas (Yes, we are taking donations to the "keep Wesley mindlessly entertained fund"). The logistics, Patrick and I can and will handle. There are a lot of options and some combination of people and dogs and valuables in cars and perhaps planes will get our family to our new home. Every time we make a plan we find new holes to fill, but I'm confident that eventually the only holes that we'll be watching out for will be pot holes.

I am more concerned with bridging my training and education while not being swallowed by all that will be required of me in the first few months. After all, I will have two children to adjust to a new life, one in a new place with a new brother, another to a whole new stage in his spiritual journey.

As you know, I've enjoyed studying transactional analysis, redecision therapy, and more recently energy psychology at the Southeast Institute. You may not know that I have some thoughts brewing on family development cycles, in particular family spiritual development cycles, as well as other ideas related to Drama Triangle roles. I could use a 9-5 week to write full-time in my office without interruption. That way I could organize my notes from all my training and my thoughts around the subjects above. But, as the birth draws nearer and as Wesley requires consistent stimulation through play and adventure, that time is less likely to happen. Which is fine, I can make do with stealing a few moments here and there to work on my projects, punch holes into papers and organize them along with my thoughts into 3-ring binders (I get giddy just thinking about it!).

I'd like to get this work done before the move so that in addition to unpacking, adjusting, and then isolation while Patrick is in COT I am not figuring out where I left off with a pile of unorganized notes. After all, one hand will likely be holding an infant and the other making a peanut butter and jelly sandwich, and it's a lot easier to use my toes to turn pages when papers are in order. (Sifting with toes is a whole different skill that I have yet to master.)

So, anyway, here I am ... sleepless at six a.m., and updating the blog, it's better than lying in bed awake tossing and turning in search of comfort. Now that I've shared my goals with family and friends I may have just the motivation I am looking for to turn on the light, take out the hole puncher and get to organizing.

Of course, as I type that I look up and see the nail holes in the wall that need filling, sanding and repainting before we move .... *sigh* ... which holes will get my time? See the dilemma? And Wesley's not even awake yet. The holes in the walls are much easier to attend to: it's a time-limited project with actual results about which I don't care what others think ... my own work, however, is different. I have no idea how long it will take and I DO care what others think. After all, the thoughts, the writing, the field of endeavor itself says a lot about me and who I am.

I'll find a way to make time for both today -- me and the house. How about that? I'll let you know how it goes. For now, I'm going to make a small pot of coffee, put a homemade waffle in the toaster, and get to punching. Read more!

Wanting -- What the World Needs

I noticed that Wesley is saying, "I need ... ." When really the word "want" would better fit considering he's asking to go outside or for one of his toys.

Brief thoughts related to wanting vs. needing:

People tend to substitute the word need for want when it isn't "OK" for them to want things or when, historically, they never got what they wanted for one reason or another.

Example 1
Child: "I want a new pair of shoes." Caretaker: "How dare you want a new pair of shoes! You have shoes. There are plenty of people who don't have shoes and you want a new pair?" This may sound like an exaggeration, but variations of this are said to children frequently. Child interpretation: How dare I want something I don't need. Only my needs will be met. I better not ask for something unless I need it.

Example 2
Child: "I want a Barbie Doll." Caretaker: "We don't have the money for that (again)." Child interpretation: Not getting what I want is painful. I feel less pain when I just don't want anything. So the child decides it is less painful (in this situation safer in others, etc.) to not be in touch with his/her wants.

Ah, a life without wants -- sounds wonderful doesn't it? After all, wouldn't it be great not to have any wants at all? This situation can come about a few ways, one of which is to be an heir to a fortune and another is to simply "not want". Either way -- life is fulfilled. Right?

Wrong.

I am not sure that children, and even adults, distinguish well between physical and spiritual satisfaction. For instance, many people think that this or that will fill them up ... inside. We've all known people who consume food and luxury items in an effort to feel better about themselves. Problem is, the physical thing doesn't match the spiritual desire.

So when we shut down our want of material things, sometimes we shut down spiritually driven desires -- internal callings.

Ever know someone who doesn't know what he or she wants to do in life? Of course you have! Heck, you've probably been in this position -- it may even be a normal part of career selection.

When children grow up thinking that only their needs will be taken care of, they shut themselves off from their wants -- their own internal selves. Ideally, choosing a career is about what you want to do, not what you have to do. Ideally, those wants are driven by a desire to activate the unique God-given virtue profile placed within you, a virtue profile that I believe, if activated and devoted to service, will lead to betterment of the world.

Once shut down, reactivation of this spontaneous, beautiful place within can be difficult.

So, back to Wesley ... what do I do now that I've noticed that his wants and needs are blending. I want to make sure he uses want where appropriate so i know that he knows 1. what he wants and that 2. he is important enough to get what he wants, when appropriate.

Two things: One, I separate my needs from my wants -- pursuing both as appropriate. And help Wesley separate his, giving him feedback as to why some are met and others are not.

Both Patrick and I have been working on this ourselves and even within a week I've noticed a change in Wesley's words. He is using the word want now -- yeah! And he is starting to use the word need appropriately too.

This is wonderful progress!

I place emphasis on this subject because I want my son to learn the difference between his needs and his wants. I want him to prioritize his pursuits in life and know that his longings -- when tuned in to his own spiritual desires and internal callings -- will lead him along God's plan.

So, what are your needs? What are your wants? Is it OK for you to want something? Is it OK for you to get it? These are all things decided by children as they watch the adults around them.

IF for no other reason than to liberate Wesley from unnecessary uncertainty, I plan on further sifting my wants from my needs.

Not only do I hope to tap in to a deeper connection with myself and with God, I hope to carry out my "heart's desires" with certainty that God has placed within me gems that will benefit mankind today. And this of course will benefit my children -- and the world -- tomorrow. Read more!

Wesley likes polar bears

Can you blame him?

They're cute.His fondness for the bears and other endangered species isn't the reason we recycle, avoid buying wasteful products, such as bottled water, and prefer alternatives to plastic things, such as toys, but it does give a connection from our home to the wilderness.

Wesley's imagination takes him everywhere: to the moon, swimming in the ocean, and to great and varied terrains around our world. When he looks at me with all sincerity and says, "I want to go see ______ (fill in the blank)." I tell him, "One day, Sweetie, you may get to do that. Until that day I'll do what I can to help you prepare."

So, how does a mother help her son meet his dreams of swimming with wild dolphins or seeing polar bears?

Well, she starts at home, by doing what she can to make sure that the things he loves and wants to explore now are there for him when he safely lets go of her hand -- to cross streets or oceans on his own.

Wesley is an explorer. (Most 2 year olds are, it's in their nature, so we'll see who he is as he grows and changes, for now, though, it fits.) Wesley delights in nature. This is a boy who pretends he is swimming with fish and sharks in his bed and wraps himself in a piece of cardboard in lieu of a rocket ship. This is a child who looks at the world around him with deep interest.

This is a child who will, despite his fondness for nature, do what Patrick and I do.

If we don't connect our actions and decisions to the world around us, he likely won't (not for a while at least). So we take from the earth's resources with moderation. We are helping him reach his dreams by treading lightly on our path through this physical world. So that the things he likes now will be there when he finally has the opportunity to pursue his dreams on his own.

Whether or not humans impact the environment to the extent that environmentalists claim is irrelevant to me. I want a beautiful world tomorrow. And I can contribute by consuming fewer of earth's resources, like oil used in the production of plastics and most synthetic fibers (such as polyester). Plastics not only are comprised partially of oil, they take years to break down, filling landfills and littering roadsides until then. Plastic bottles have their place, perhaps an occasional camping trip, but not in everyday use. Think about it: Not only is the plastic itself a waste of oil and a long-term eye sore wherever it ends up, it took oil to ship them to the store. Surely, one of these cool SIGG bottles fits your style.

Reducing plastics and paper products is a small step. Larger steps include reducing your overall consumerism and reliance on shopping/obtaining things to feel good about yourself. We all feel the pull ... I do, at least. I'll be walking through a department store will see a new purse and think, "wow, it's on sale and really cute." Somewhere subconsciously I am thinking others will admire my style and my inner child is ready to pull out her ATM card.

I know the justifications: it's on sale, it's cheap, it's from a thrift store ... So what? It doesn't matter where they came from, a leather pair of shoes takes 25 to 40 years to decompose. That nylon dress on sale will take 30 to 40 years to decompose, compared to cotton, which takes around 5 months.

Read more about your trash's lifespan here.

This blog entry is all over the place, I just want to dump some thoughts and rather than leak green philosophy here and there, thought I'd get it off my chest in one post. (That said, I reserve the right to leak green.)

Hopefully our children will be more responsible than we are and then their children and so on ... all choices have some give and take and sometimes convenience wins even the best of conservationists ... Read more!

Ten Years Ago

I met Patrick ten years ago. He was a senior studying physics and I was in graduate school.

I liked a lot of things about Patrick, I especially liked that he had a plan: "I want to travel and explore the world, not in the 5-star hotel way, rather in a way that gives back to the people of every place I go."

We shared a desire to enhance the world. The difference between us at the time, however, was that he had a plan. Like me, Patrick has a lot of interests and had a lot of paths he could have pursued.

"I just picked one," he said.

He made it sound so simple: Just pick a path and devote yourself to it.

He had picked the MD, MPH route with a desire to bring health to the greatest number of people that he could. Three to four months after we met he left on a journey that would take him to medical school in Israel.

What could have taken 4 years of education ended up taking 5 years because he took a year off in the middle for us to spend time together after our wedding. Then he returned to Israel and I visited/lived there when I could.

The next step on his path was a residency in family medicine so he could translate his book knowledge into a body knowledge. Then, the final phase of his formal education: a residency in public health leading to a masters degree.

That final phase is finished.

The road has been long and paved with gems. Here are a few that I have gleaned through my husband's journey:

** Picking a path doesn't exclude all other paths, it provides a focus.
** There is no real "end" or "goal" to the path ... the path itself is the goal; The path is life.
** Life doesn't start at some point in the future: Life is now.
** Be flexible. You may not know how you are going to get there and open doors may shut in your face, but there's always a way around or through if you don't give up, if you believe in yourself.
** You don't need to be "special" to reach your goal.
** Goals that allow you to express "you" are worthy.
** It may not be the end that is most inspiring to others, rather what you do on the path.
** There is no magic number, or date, or condition that is worth waiting for before you start (on your path, living, or just feeling good about yourself). Just start!
** Let your heart shine ... your beauty does not take away from others, real beauty does not compete with others ...

So, yes, I am proud of my husband for completing his MD MPH goals, but not because of the title ... rather because of his perseverance, his focus, his dedication, his joy along the way ...

It's not that "now" he can do things, he's been doing things all along toward his goal of helping people ... now is a continuation of yesterday and today ... a constant motion.

I've never heard of a goal that "starts tomorrow" that works ... I've only heard of goals that are in process now that work ...

Thank you, Patrick for showing me that an imperfect now is preferable to the nonexistent "perfect tomorrow"!!!!! Read more!

Today is a Double Latte Day

... and it's only 7 a.m.

I'll tell you why when I get back from Lowes. By the way, I printed off a coupon for $10 off a $25 purchase that I found at this blog site.

OK, so I'll be back to tell the tale of the late brother and how it led me to a rare $4.55 purchase at Starbucks.

***I'm back***

I was inspired to plant an herb garden today when I found and purchased 14 herbs for .50 each at Lowes. I even purchased 4 at regular price to round out the garden, which is around one existing blueberry bush. I plan to plant another bush and two rosemary bushes to complete the edible section of that bed. Behind the rosemary bushes I'll plant a climber of some sort, a hydrangea and some sort of fall bloomer to go with the mums over in a corner.

OK, enough about my Lowes spree, back to the story of the morning.

Last night my brother Glen called and wanted a ride to the airport. Sure, no problem, just get here at 5:15 (since you are also borrowing a suitcase and want to print out your ticket information) so we can leave around 5:45.

Patrick and I got up at 5 a.m. because Patrick also had to be at the airport this morning, though we could have slept in until at least 6/6:30.

5:45 rolls around: no Glen, no phone call.

Where is he? I wonder.

I call.

Oh, I'm 15 minutes away, he says ... OK, I say.

30 minutes later he shows up. He spends the next 10 minutes packing and then gets into the car and says, All I need is my I.D. card right?

Um, well, do you know which airline you are taking?

He goes inside to print up his ticket information ...

We arrive at the airport 45 minutes before his flight departs.

So, what did we talk about on the way there? Him.

I told him how angry I was that he didn't bother to call me and took for granted that it'd be no problem to wake up when we could have slept. And what about Wesley?

I made sure to tell him that I love him and that my criticism had nothing to do with who he is, but how he behaved, because I know he has the capacity to think for himself and to be responsible and respectful.

This is an important point anytime we give feedback to others or reprimand our children ... remember to focus on the what, not the who. I'm not sure about this, but it seems to me that guilt is felt when we do something wrong, and shame is felt when we wrap up the who with the do and feel that we -- in our core of cores -- are wrong because we did something wrong. Simply not true.

I didn't call him a jerk, lazy, or a dumby (which I have heard parents do all too often), but rather gave feedback on his actions and how they affected me and my family.

And here's another point ... "I'm just not responsible" or "I just don't follow through" (which he didn't say, by the way, he took everything I said to heart and didn't make excuses -- yeah, Glen, that's so hard sometimes) are not appropriate responses. Responsibility and follow through are not genetic traits, they are skills! If you don't have them, either deal with the consequences and accept your role in those consequences or develop the skill ... responsibility and follow through do come easier to some than others, but that doesn't make them a genetic trait, they are skills that can be learned by anybody.

***

OK, stepping off my soap box now.

So, you see, I went to SB to get a latte to have the energy to get through the day with a very active 2-year-old on only a few hours sleep. While in line Wesley opened his eyes long enough to spot the chocolate milk, point to it and say "that" and put his head back down on my shoulder and fall asleep.

And THAT's how I spent $4.55 at Starbucks.

At least I made up for it with my $10 gift card ... oh forget it .. I don't need excuses ... I wanted a latte, I bought a latte -- good night! Read more!

The Family

We are a very statistically typical family holding on to our idealism and the dreams of traveling the world that started it all. It's very hard sometimes to plan to go overseas when all I really want to do is plant some roots!

Related Posts:
Saying Good-Bye
Importance of Imagination and Family Play Time
Our Toes Have Been Busy!
No Need for an Alarm Clock!

Craft Fun:
Homemade Boat
Name that Craft (Rainmaker)

Religion:

Read more!